29 February 2004 @ 01:42 am
He Cannot Hear You (Lord of the Rings)  
Title: He Cannot Hear You
Author: Lilith ([info]lilithilien)
Fandom Lord of the Rings
Pairings: Faramir/Beregond
Warnings: PG-13
Disclaimer: I did not create these characters, I do not own them, I receive no money for these stories. My only reward is reader feedback. *begs*
Summary: Beregond thinks about the Steward in the Houses of Healing.
Notes: An angsty little piece for the LoM Official Man-Fan Club’s Flavour of the Month (Beregond’s a special “leap year” flavour). Written late and unbeta-ed, so any problems are mine alone! Originally posted at LiveJournal.

He Cannot Hear You

You know he cannot hear you. He lies so still and quiet, far beyond the peace of ordinary sleep, in a world your words cannot reach. The healers’ best efforts cannot even wake him from this deep slumber. Their grave faces reveal that they hold out little hope for the steward’s youngest son – now the Steward of Gondor himself, though he has not been conscious since that title became his. You cannot allow yourself the luxury of abandoning hope, even though the only sign of life inside this broken body is the fever that scorches you as you hold his hand in yours.

You know he cannot hear you, but you cannot bring yourself to leave his side. Although it cuts you to the quick to see your valiant captain so pale and drawn, you cannot bear to think of him lying there all alone. And he would truly be alone. His beloved brother is gone; his father too in a fit of madness. You think that it is no wonder that he wants to join them in his faraway dreams. So for three days you have sat here, without rest and with little food, waiting for him to return. When he wakes up – and he will wake up, you are certain – he will see the face of one who loves him.

You know he cannot hear you, so you tell him all the things you could never say before. You tell him that he is the most courageous man you have ever known, and that you want your son to grow up to be just like him. You tell him that since your wife’s death you have been so lonely, and only his unwavering friendship has kept you sane. You cannot tell him when your feelings turned to love, for you do not know the exact moment yourself, but you can tell him that you have long wished for the courage to press your lips against his, as you are now planting a soft kiss on his smouldering forehead.

You know he cannot hear you, so when the Dúnedain ranger comes to take your place at his bedside, and encourages you to take a short rest, you accept his offer. You are blinded when you see the sun for the first time in days. In the harsh reality of daylight you begin to wonder what he would think if he could hear the things you have said. You wonder if he would hate you for the way you feel. You wonder if you could say these things anyway, for you know you needed to give voice to them. You realise it does not matter; his dreams keep him far away, and your secrets safe.

You know he cannot hear you. So when you return to his chamber, and see him sitting up in bed, you know not what to think. You are overjoyed to see him there, the colour returning to his pale skin, his ruby red lips looking more enticing than you have ever seen them. But you also feel a pang of regret at losing the chance to say all you wanted to say when you had a chance. Then you see him smile at you, a wondrous smile full of love and acceptance. And then you hear Faramir say, “I heard every word you said. Tell me more, Beregond.”